Emva kokuba nomntwana, umbuzo omkhulu engqondweni yakho ngulo, 'Ndingabuyela emsebenzini okanye ndihlale ekhaya nomntwana?' Ngaba esi asiso sigqibo sikhulu nesinzima umama omtsha aza kujongana naso? Abanye oomama bebesoloko becinga ngokubuyela emsebenzini ukususela ngaphambi kokuba babe nomntwana wabo. Abanye sele begqibe kwelokuba bafuna 'ukuhlala ekhaya'. Kodwa xa umntwana esezandleni zakho, yonke into inokwahluka. Namhlanje, siza kuthetha ngesi sigqibo sikhulu, iinkxalabo onazo, kunye nendlela yokukhetha into ekusebenzela kakuhle wena nosapho lwakho.
Ukuthandabuza komama omtsha
Wonke umama omtsha ujongene nengxaki yokuba aye emsebenzini okanye ahlale ekhaya. Ngamanye amaxesha izinto azihambi ngendlela ebesicwangcise ngayo. Khawuthelekelele, usebenze nzima waza wafunda nzima, kwaye ube nomsebenzi olungileyo. Mhlawumbi uceba ukubuyela emsebenzini kwiinyanga ezimbalwa emva kokuba nomntwana. Kodwa wakuba ubambe umntwana ezingalweni zakho, xa ujonga loo buso mncinci, unokucinga, "Owu, ndingamshiya njani lo mntwana ndize ndiye emsebenzini?"
Kwelinye icala, usenokuba ucinga ukuba, “Andiyi kubuyela emsebenzini, ndiza kuhlala ekhaya nomntwana.” Kodwa emva kwexesha elithile, unokuqonda ukuba ukuhlala ekhaya kuyadinisa kwaye kukwenza ube wedwa. Usenokuziva unesizungu ngaphandle kwabahlobo bakho okanye abantu osebenza nabo, kwaye usenokuziva ngathi uphoswa lithuba lakho.
Iingcali zempilo yengqondo zithi akufanele wenze naziphi na izigqibo ezinkulu nezihlala zihleli ngobomi bakho, nokuba ulindele umntwana okanye kunyaka wokuqala emva kokuba unaye. Kuba akukho mntu unokuqikelela ukuba uza kuziva njani xa usiba ngumama.
Abanye oomama bacinga ukuba baya kukuthanda ukunyamekela abantwana babo, kodwa emva kwexesha elithile, ukungakwazi ukunyamekela umntwana wabo kunokubenza babe nomsindo kwaye baxhalabe. Abanye bayamangaliswa yindlela abayonwabela ngayo ukuhlala ekhaya. Ngoko ke akukho mpendulo ichanekileyo okanye engalunganga koku. Esi sigqibo sixhomekeke ngokupheleleyo kwindlela ocinga ngayo, uthungelwano lwenkxaso onalo, kunye nemeko yosapho lwakho.
Izinto ekufuneka ziqwalaselwe xa usenza esi sigqibo
Ngaphambi kokuba uthathe isigqibo sokuba uye emsebenzini okanye awuyi, kukho izinto ezimbalwa ekufuneka uziqwalasele ngononophelo. Masibone ukuba zeziphi.
| Izinto ekufuneka ziqwalaselwe | Indlela yokucinga ngayo |
|---|---|
| Imeko yezoqoqosho | Ngamafutshane, ukuba awuyi emsebenzini, ngaba uza kukwazi ukulawula iindleko zasekhaya? Ngaba umvuzo womyeni wakho uza kuba ngumthombo wokufumana umvuzo kuphela? Ukuba uya emsebenzini, kuza kubiza malini ukuhlawula umnakekeli okanye indawo yokugcina abantwana? Ukuba ngamanye amaxesha uchitha inxalenye enkulu yomvuzo wakho koku, cinga ukuba ingaba kukho inzuzo yezoqoqosho na ukuya emsebenzini. |
| Inkathalo efunekayo ngumntwana | Umntwana omncinci udinga ukhathalelo oluzinzileyo noluthembekileyo. Kungcono ukuba umntwana afumane ukhathalelo oluninzi kangangoko kunokwenzeka kumama nakutata. Kodwa ukuba uya emsebenzini, ngubani oza kumnyamekela umntwana? Ingaba ngumama wakho, umamazala wakho? Okanye ngomnye umntu? Ubathemba kangakanani? Iziko lokunyamekela abantwana elilungileyo nelisemgangathweni linokuba lukhetho olufanelekileyo. |
| Ukulungiselela kwakho ngengqondo | Le yeyona nto ibalulekileyo. Ukuba uhlala ekhaya kwaye ikwenza ube nomsindo kwaye ube lusizi, oko akulunganga kumntwana. Kwakhona, ukuba uya emsebenzini kwaye uzive unetyala kakhulu, ukuba uhlala ucinga ukuba, 'Bekufanele ukuba ndihlale ekhaya,' oko akulunganga nakumntwana. Eyona nto ibalulekileyo kumntwana kukuba wonwabe. |
| Ukuncancisa | Ukuncancisa kunokuba ngumceli mngeni ukuba uza kusebenza. Kodwa akunakwenzeka. Kufuneka ucwangcise kwangaphambili, njengokumpompa nokujonga ukuba kukho na izinto ezifunekayo emsebenzini. |
Uloyiko lokuba "Ngaba ndiza kuba ngumama olungileyo?"
Amaxesha amaninzi, oomama bayasokola nombuzo othi, "Ndifanele ndiye emsebenzini? Ndifanele ndihlale ekhaya?" Kodwa isizathu sokwenyani saloo nto kukoyika nokuxhalaba kokuba "Ndingaba ngumama olungileyo ?" Ingakumbi ukuba ubungenalo ubudlelwane obuhle nomama wakho, olu loyiko lunokuba lukhulu nangakumbi. Ngelo xesha, ubonakalisa olo loyiko ngombuzo wokuba uya kuba kulo msebenzi okanye hayi.
Baza kuthini abanye oomama? (“Iimfazwe zoMama”)
Oku nako kuyingxaki enkulu. Ukuba ugqiba ekubeni uhlale ekhaya, oomama abasebenzayo baza kukujonga ngendlela engaqhelekanga. "Ngaba amantombazana ahlala ekhaya kule mihla?" umntu angabuza. Ukuba ugqiba ekubeni uye emsebenzini, oomama abahlala ekhaya banokucinga, "Owu Thixo wam, umntwana akanaxabiso ngaphezu kwemali?"
Eyona nto ibalulekileyo kukuqonda ukuba abo bagxeka ngolu hlobo bakwingxabano enkulu ngaphakathi kubo. Wonke umntu uzama ukubonisa ukuba isigqibo sakhe sesona sifanelekileyo. Eyona ndlela ilula yokwenza oko kukugxeka isigqibo somnye umntu. Ngoko ke musa ukuthatha oko kuthethwa ngabanye abantu.
Ungaya emsebenzini kuba uyithanda, kuba umsebenzi wakho ubalulekile. Omnye umntu angaya emsebenzini ngenxa yeengxaki zemali zosapho. Iimeko zomntu ngamnye zahlukile.
Ukhetha njani eyona ilungele usapho lwakho?
Oku kufana nokutsalana. Kukulinganisela. Ukuba ugqiba ekubeni uye emsebenzini, nazi ezinye izinto onokuzenza:
- Zinike ixesha lomntwana wakho: Yiya emsebenzini wesikolo womntwana wakho nakwimicimbi ekhethekileyo nanini na xa kunokwenzeka. Xa ufika ekhaya uvela emsebenzini, nikela elo xesha kubantwana bakho ngokupheleleyo. Balalise, uze emva koko wenze umsebenzi wakho.
- Nika abantwana iveki yonke: Endaweni yokwenza imisebenzi yasekhaya nokuthenga ngempelaveki, bekela bucala ixesha lokwenza izinto abantwana bakho abazithandayo, udlale nabo, kwaye uhambehamba.
- Thetha kakuhle ngomsebenzi: Endaweni yokuthi phambi kwabantwana bakho, "Owu, ndiya kulo msebenzi kuba ndifuna imali," thetha izinto ezinje, "Umama uyawuthanda lo msebenzi, uyamonwabisa."
Ukuba ugqiba ekubeni uhlale ekhaya:
- Zinike ixesha: Ukuba nomntwana wakho imini yonke kunokuba yinto edinisayo. Yenza into oyithandayo, funda incwadi, utsalele umnxeba umhlobo, okanye ubekele ecaleni ixesha elincinci lakho yonke imihla.
- Qhagamshelana nabanye oomama: Qhagamshelana nabanye oomama ekhaya njengani, ncokolani, nize nidlale nabantwana benu kunye. Oku kuya kukunceda uphephe ukuba nesithukuthezi .
Ekugqibeleni, obu bubomi bakho, usapho lwakho, umntwana wakho. Ukuba isigqibo osenzayo sizisa ulonwabo kuwe, kumyeni wakho nakumntwana wakho, sisigqibo esifanelekileyo . Ukuba uziva uxinezelekile okanye uxhalabile ngale nto, thetha nomhlobo othembekileyo, ilungu losapho, okanye ugqirha wakho, okanye umcebisi wezempilo yengqondo ukuba kuyimfuneko. Kungaba luncedo kakhulu.
Umyalezo Wokuya Ekhaya
- Akukho mpendulo "echanekileyo" okanye "engalunganga" malunga nokuba uye emsebenzini okanye uhlale ekhaya emva kokuba nomntwana . Sisigqibo somntu ngamnye.
- Xa usenza esi sigqibo, cinga ngazo zonke ezi zinto zintathu: imeko yezemali yentsapho yakho, inkathalo efunyanwa ngumntwana wakho, kunye nempilo-ntle yakho yengqondo .
- Musa ukuhoya oko kuthethwa okanye kugxekwa ngabanye. Usapho ngalunye lwahlukile, imeko kamama ngamnye yahlukile.
- Nokuba uthatha siphi na isigqibo, musa ukuziva unetyala ngaso. Umama owonwabileyo ngumama olungileyo kumntwana.
- Ukuba uziva uxinezelekile okanye uxhalabile ngale nto, ungoyiki ukuthetha ngayo. Funa ingcebiso kagqirha ukuba kuyimfuneko.
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