Ukuba une-ADHD ( attention deficit hyperactivity disorder), ungaziva ngathi iqabane lakho ngamanye amaxesha liyacaphuka yindlela oziphethe ngayo. Kodwa usenokungazi ukuba yintoni ebakhathazayo okanye into omawuyenze ngayo. Nangona ubudlelwane bonke bahlukile, kukho izizathu eziqhelekileyo zokuba iingxaki zihlale zivela. Umzekelo, ukudideka kwakho, ukulibala, kunye nokungxama kunokubangela ukungavisisani phakathi kwenu. Masichonge ngqo apho ezi ngxaki zivela khona kwaye sithethe ngeendlela zokunciphisa uxinzelelo.
Xa ingxolo iba yingxaki
Xa ethetha ngokuhlala nomntu one-ADHD, ibhinqa elinguChristine lithi: “Ndingumntu oceba izinto, umntu ocwangcisiweyo. Ndisoloko ndicinga ngento eza kwenzeka emva koko.” Umyeni wakhe, uMax, une-ADHD.
UMax uphambene ngokupheleleyo. Nangona engayikhathaleli le ngxubakaxaka, uChristine uyifumana iyingxaki enkulu. Uthi, "Umyeni wam ebehlala kwindawo engcolileyo ubomi bakhe bonke. Kodwa kum, ukubona ingxubakaxaka kundenza ndizive ndixinezelekile kakhulu."
Ngokutsho kukaSharon Saleen, ingcali yezengqondo egxile kwi-ADHD, oku kuqhelekile kakhulu. "Izibini ezine-ADHD zihlala zineengcinga ezingqubanayo malunga nocwangco kunye nolungelelwaniso. Oku kunokubacaphukisa bobabini abantu."
Ngamafutshane, into eqhelekileyo komnye umntu inokuba yingxaki enkulu komnye umntu.
Wenza ntoni ngale nto?
Kunye, yenzani uluhlu lwezinto enizifumana zinzima okanye zibangela uxinezeleko (ii-activator). Khethani ezona zilula kakhulu eninokuzisebenza kuqala. Emva koko nize nendlela yokuzihlela. Oku kungaba kukubhala imibala, okanye ukubeka izinto kwiibhokisi ezahlukeneyo ngokulandelelana kwealfabhethi. Into ebalulekileyo kukufumana indlela enivumelana ngayo nobabini.
Iingxaki zokwabelana ngemisebenzi yasekhaya
UTeri, ohlala noWilliam, one- ADHD , uthi: "Ngamanye amaxesha ndiziva ngathi ndim ndedwa omele athwale yonke imisebenzi yasekhaya aze enze isicwangciso sayo yonke into."
Ekubeni uWilliam engakhathali ngomsebenzi wasekhaya, uTerry uthatha izintambo aze enze yonke into. Uthi ukuba ebengakwenzi, akukho nto ibiya kwenziwa. "Kufuneka ndilawule yonke into ndize ndinike abanye umsebenzi."
Le yinto eqhelekileyo kubudlelwane be-ADHD, utsho uChad Perman, umcebisi womtshato nosapho. "Iqabane elingengomntu one-ADHD lidla ngokwenza uninzi lomsebenzi wasekhaya kunye nokunyamekela abantwana kuba bahlelekile ngakumbi, bathembekile, kwaye bayakwazi ukugqiba imisebenzi ngexesha elifanelekileyo."
Oku kungaba lulwalamano "lomzali nomntwana " ngokuhamba kwexesha. Nangona iqabane lakho liba "ngumzali onoxanduva," wena usenokuba "ngumntwana ongenaxanduva" ngokungazi. Oku kunokuba yinto ecaphukisayo kuni nobabini.
| Indlela iqabane elingenayo i-ADHD elicinga ngayo | Yintoni eyenzekayo kuwe ngokwenene ukuba une-ADHD? |
|---|---|
| "Ndimele ndikukhumbuze yonke into. Njengomntwana omncinci." | "Ndinengxaki yokukhumbula izinto. Ndifuna ukukhunjuzwa." |
| "Undilibele. Akandikhathalele." | "Ingqwalasela yam iphazamiseka lula. Kunzima kum ukuyilawula." |
| "Akawugqibi umsebenzi xa sele ewuqalile. Ulivila kakhulu." | "Ndinengxaki yokugxila kwinto enye ngexesha. Kundibangela uxinezeleko olukhulu." |
Wenza ntoni ngale nto?
Hlalani phantsi nithethe. Vumelanani ngemisebenzi ethile eniza kuyenza. Bekani izikhumbuzi kwifowuni yenu ukuze ningalibali ukuyenza. Kwakhona, xelela iqabane lakho xa nigqibile umsebenzi. Oku kuya kunciphisa uxinzelelo kulo.
Xa ulibale into ebalulekileyo...
Ukulibala kunokubangela uxinzelelo olukhulu kulwalamano. Njengoko uTeri esitsho, "Ngamanye amaxesha ndithumela uWilliam evenkileni ukuba ayokuthatha izinto ezimbini. Kumthatha ixesha elide ukufika apho, aze agqibe ebuyile nento enye kuphela."
Uyahleka aze alibale ngezinto ezincinci ezinjalo. Kodwa uthi kwakhona, "Andihleki xa ndicinga ngokuba ikati iza kulibala ukuyityisa okanye inja iza kuphelelwa ngamanzi xa ndingekho."
KwanoMax uyazi ukuba ukulibala kwakhe yingxaki. "Ngamanye amaxesha ndithembisa ukuthumelela umfazi wam ileta ndize ndilibale ukuyenza ngexesha. Ngamanye amaxesha ndiyalibala ngokupheleleyo."
Xa engakwazi ukugcina isithembiso, uziva edanile. "Ufanele akwazi ukundithemba. Kunzima ukuba nomntu ongenakumthemba. Kumele ukuba kuyabuhlungu kakhulu xa ubuza ukuba iqabane lakho linokumthemba na."
Wenza ntoni ngale nto?
Yenza uluhlu lwezinto ekufuneka zenziwe. Lucime xa ugqibile umsebenzi. Beka izikhumbuzo nezaziso kwifowuni yakho. Ukuba kunokwenzeka, lubhale ebhodini emhlophe eludongeni apho iqabane lakho linokukubona khona.
Xa iqabane lakho lingasaziva lithandwa
Xa ulibala ngezinto ezibalulekileyo kwiqabane lakho, xa ungazinaki iimfuno zalo, lisenokuvakalelwa kukuba awulikhathaleli. "Oku kuqhelekile kakhulu kubudlelwane ne-ADHD," utshilo uNed Hallowell, MD, ingcali ye-ADHD. Nangona unobangela usenokuba yi-neurological, omnye umntu unokukubona njengokungabikho kothando.
Oku kwenzeka kuTheri xa uWilliam elahlekelwa yingqwalasela epheleleyo xa ekunye naye. "Ngamanye amaxesha uhamba ngokukhawuleza. Uyalibala ukuba ndiphi kuba ingqalelo yakhe ikwenye indawo."
"Ukuba siya epatini, undilibala ngokupheleleyo xa ebona abahlobo bakhe. Akaqapheli nokuba ndifuna isiselo okanye ndibambeke phakathi kwesihlwele." Uyazi ukuba uWilliam akenzi ezi zinto ngabom. Kodwa uvakalelwa kukuba uWilliam akamkhathaleli.
UWilliam uthi, “Ndiyaxolisa kakhulu ukuba uvakalelwa ngaloo ndlela, kuba loo nto ayiyonjongo yam.” Okwenzekayo ngokwenene kukuba ingqondo yakhe igcwele izinto ezininzi ngaxeshanye, kwaye wenza izinto ngokukhawuleza, kwaye kukho izinto aziphosayo.
Wenza ntoni ngale nto?
UWilliam noTerry bathi kuyanceda ukuthetha ngezinto ngokuzolileyo, ngaphandle kokugxekana. "Emva koko singasebenzisana ukufumana isisombululo sengxaki." Ukuba une-ADHD, ungenza imisebenzi yokukhumbula. Oku kunokukunceda uhlale kule meko yangoku.
Xa ngequbuliso ufunda into efika engqondweni
I-ADHD ingayichaphazela nendlela othetha ngayo neqabane lakho. Ungathetha nantoni na efika engqondweni yakho, ube nengxaki yokumamela incoko, okanye ngequbuliso umphazamise omnye umntu ngelixa bethetha.
"Iqabane elingenayo i-ADHD lifumanisa ukuba ezi zinto zimbi kakhulu, azikhathali, kwaye ziyenzakalisa.""Kunjalo ke," utshilo umcebisi uParman.
“Izibini ezininzi ezine-ADHD zilwa nokuphazamiseka okukhulu ngokweemvakalelo kunye neengxabano eziqatha,” utshilo uSharon Saleen.
Wenza ntoni ngale nto?
Cinga ngaphambi kokuba uthethe. Xa unomsindo kakhulu, thatha ixesha lokuphumla. Zola, uze ubuye nithethe ngaloo nto.
Nokuba yintoni na ingxaki, ziqheliseleni ukumamela ngokukhutheleyo ubuncinane kanye ngeveki. Thethani ngeengxaki eziqhelekileyo kunye nize nifumane izisombululo. Jongani imeko ngendlela eyakhayo nanini na xa kunokwenzeka. Phumlani xa iimvakalelo ziphezulu. Gxila kwiimpawu ezintle eninazo nobabini kunye nezinto enifana ngazo. Khumbulani, le ayilodabi enimele nilwe nodwa, yinto enifanele niyoyise nobabini. Ukuba ufuna ingcebiso engaphezulu ngale nto, thethani nogqirha wakho okanye nomcebisi ofanelekileyo.
Umyalezo Wokuya Ekhaya
- I-ADHD ayilotyala lomntu, yimeko enxulumene nokusebenza kwenkqubo yemithambo-luvo. Ngoko ke musa ukuzibeka ityala okanye ugxeke iqabane lakho.
- Zama ukuqonda ukuba kutheni le ngxaki zenzeka. Qonda isizathu sokuziphatha komntu one-ADHD (umz., ukungakwazi ukugxila) kunye nendlela enokumenza umntu ongena-ADHD azive ngayo (umz., ukungabi naluthando).
- Kunye, fumanani izisombululo ezisebenzayo. Bekani izikhumbuzo kwifowuni yenu, yenzani uluhlu, kwaye nabelane ngemisebenzi.
- Unxibelelwano yeyona nto ibalulekileyo. Thetha ngengqondo yakho ngoxolo, ungabi namsindo. Zinike ixesha lokuphulaphulana.
- Ukuba kunzima ukuhamba wedwa kolu hambo, ungathandabuzi ukucela uncedo kugqirha okanye kumcebisi.
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